This is a video of me reading five parts of a freewrite serial I am currently publishing on my steemit blog (but published here for the first time all in one place)
If you prefer to read, rather than watch, all five parts are below the video. I hope you enjoy it.
There was something wrong about the man with the umbrella.
It was the way he held it.
He wasn't like the others in the street, who were actualy using theirs to prevent the large water droplets that fell in sheets from the sky from getting them drenched. It was also the way he wasn't getting wet.
And the way was looking at me.
Staring at me, rather. His expression was difficult to read. Was it hatred? Victory? Relief? Perhaps it was all of these things.
Or none of them.
On his wrist was a devise that looked like an ordinary wrist watch. Of the type that people used to wear before the age of smart phones and watches. He was fiddling with it. As I watched I saw something around the man flicker.
That was no ordinary watch.
As the illusion field around the man fell away into nothing I realised what was wrong about the man with the umbrella.
It was not a man at all.
And what he carried was not in any way an umbrella. I took a deep breath and turned and ran as if my life depended on it.
Which of course... it did.
When people think of aliens they think of little green or grey men. Ask most people to draw a picture of the most savage and dangerous alien in all the known universes, it is unlikey they would draw a picture of a polar bear.
However - to a human at least (and at the moment, that was the body I was wearing) - the Shavzer's look exactly like that.
A bit like the real polar bears: they kind of look cute. That is, until you get up close and they rip off your head. As far as the Shavzer's are concerned they don't even need to get that close. Their telekenisis powers are pretty advanced. They can rip a man's (or woman's - the Shavzers are equal opportunity killers) head off from a hundred feet away. Which is why I was running as fast as I could from the creature.
The people around me didn't notice that they were sharing a busy and wet street with a large alien that looked like a polar bear, disguised as a city gent holding an umbrella. But they were more than a little annoyed at the mad man running through them pushing them out of the way shouting "Fuck!"
The voice of a woman.
Shouting above the noise of "I say"s and "Do you mind"s and "So rude!"s and "Language"s, from the members of the human race I was barging out of the way in my haste to escape the vicious murdering polar bear alien thing that was chasing me.
Have you ever tried to locate the sound of someone calling your name, whilst you are screaming "fuuuuuckkkk!" at the top of your voice, pushing your way through a crowd who just don't see why they should let the rude man through, whilst being chased by a psychotic alien bear with telekinetic powers, without slowing down?
Let tell you: it isn't easy.
Eventually, I found her. I could hear the Shavzer's feet pounding the ground behind me. Hopefully he was still over a hundred feet away or I was dead meat. Literally. She was up high. Standing on the fourth floor of what looked like a multistory carpark. And she was holding what looked like a bunch of black and white balloons.
They weren't what they seemed, of course.
She was hanging over the concrete ledge, smiling at me, beckoning me with her free hand.
And I mean free hand.
That is the hand that was - at the moment, anyway - not actually attached to her body.
Marzie is such a bloody show off. She always was so much better at controlling the bodies she inhabited, and manipulating them to get the best out of them. The human body I wore was just thrown on like an ill fitting suit from one of the charity shops that seemed to be so popular in this part of Earth.
"Up here, arsehole!" she called cheerfully. Then, "He's gaining on you, you know? I think you have about five seconds before he is in range and takes your ugly head off!"
The last time I saw Marzie we were taking a little holiday on one of the new Ice Word Adventure moon's that her daddy owned. He had a string of them across two or three universes. I'm not sure why Marzie invited me unless it was to shag me senseless every night and then ritually humiliate me the next day during the ridiculously physical activities.
Of course, it could equally have been for my sparkling wit and conversation.
"Marzie!" I shout, or it was a shout in my mind, in reality with this stupid human coat I was wearing it came out rather like a wet fart of a pant.
"What?" she shouted, the balloons that were not balloons bouncing in the wind. "Do you need a hand, arsehole?"
I nodded as I ran and my human head wobbled alarming. It was in danger of coming off, I realised. I had been in a little bit of a rush when I arrived on the planet. I had not chosen a well fitting human body, and it was not attached as it should be (must have missed a button, somewhere), but in a different way to Marzie's hand that came wooshing down towards me. It arrived within a couple of metres of me, balled into a fist, rotated and the middle finger rose up. Trust Marzie to give me the finger at a time like this.
"I haven't got time for this shit!" I mind-shouted.
"Ha ha ha!" Marzie mind-laughed back at me and then the fingers of her hand opened to reveal what looked like a crumpled dead leaf.
Looks - as you might be coming to realise - can be very, very deceptive.